Monday, August 1, 2011

Whit's Wisdom

I've been on a blog sabbatical the last two weeks.  The first was due to my "Stay-cation" in which we stayed home and did some work around the house, did a little bit of fun stuff, and I basically refused to do any sort of housework.  The second week consisted of sitting in a hospital room with my Mom for seven days while the Doctors tried to figure out what exactly was causing her to be in such pain.  The final diagnosis was Salmonella - source unknown.  She is home now and feeling about 85% well and we are both planning on NEVER going back to the hospital again!  Honestly, we received wonderful care and are very grateful to the Doctors and Hospital Staff, but it was NOT Disney World!

During Mom's stay at the hospital we spoke with a number of different people on a variety of subjects.  It's just what people do when they are waiting or helping each other.  You talk.  You share stories.  You discuss things you might not even discuss with a friend or neighbor.  You give advice.  You take advice.  You get to know each other.  Had my Mother not been so sick and in so much pain, we honestly would have had a really nice time.  I will be blogging about some of the things we discussed over the week, but let me start with the one I find most important.

It's amazing what an affect you can have on someone by just taking a few minutes to ask them something about themselves.  My Mom, even on her worst days, made it a point to ask everyone who entered her room something about their personal life.  Not SUPER personal - just a friendly "how are you today?" or "do you have any children?" or "how was your off day yesterday?".  And then she waited for their answer....and listened....and remembered.  So when the lady with three children came in two days later, she mentioned those children in conversation.  Mom laughed with the fella who came to check her IV - and he felt comfortable enough to walk back in  to share something funny he had read on her chart.  She (and I) gave the cleaning lady advice about how to monitor her daughter's cell phone time.  We talked the X-ray Technician into relaxing about life and just enjoy dating.  My Mom and Daddy showed compassion to the Nurse who sprained her ankle and went out of their way to keep her from walking on it. 

Mom had one Nurse who gave us the impression she might be hard to get along with.  She wasn't one to chat, she didn't seem to have much compassion, and just basically rubbed us the wrong way.  But instead of complaining, Mom and I 'niced' her to death.  We thanked her for everything she did, we were patient, we were kind, we were understanding...and she turned out to be one of the best Nurses we had!  She was just not a talkative person - she even said her Husband talked for the both of them.  Instead of just writing her off as a 'bad Nurse' we made an effort to find the good...and we found it!  She was just different from the norm.

I guess my ramblings here are to remind you all to that a little kindness and attention can go a long way.  My Mom did not feel good at all - I was a worried mess -so in all fairness, no one would have blamed either of us if we had been demanding and rude.  But my Mom set a wonderful example which I followed.  In all her pain she took time to be nice to those who were looking after her and, in doing so, she was given superb care and treated with respect.  Before we left two of the Staff came into her room to hug her and thank her for being so wonderful.  She demonstrated, by actions and words, that she appreciated all their hard work.

Next time you are faced with a choice of Kindness or Rudeness - why don't you take the road less traveled?  It can make all the difference....

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