I mentioned yesterday that I learned a LOT last week while my Mom was sick in the hospital. Well, today I want to talk about an absolutely precious X-Ray Technician that, for some reason, seemed to feel confident in confiding some of her personal life to my Mom and I. Now, I won't begin to tell you her entire story because that would be wrong - but I will give you a brief overview so that we can get to the 'wisdom' portion of this writing.
Seems that Madame X (ha, get it?) had a wonderful life going on. She was divorced, but had a beautiful, healthy daughter and a secure job. She also had a long-distance boyfriend and another guy she was interested in here in town (nothing serious with either). And she was absolutely worrying herself to death about these two fellas. Could she let herself get involved with someone ever again, should she tell the guy away about the guy here, was she doing the right thing with either of them....blah, blah, blah! Like I said, she was just one of the most effervescent people I have ever met. I simply could not believe she was putting herself through such inner turmoil. Once she finally took a big long breathe, I asked "So....why are you in such a hurry? Are you happy with your life? Are things good just the way they are right now?" and she answered "oh, yes - I love my life now!"
So do you get where I'm headed here? This lovely woman, with a very happy life, with lots of fun going on was basically RUNNING towards her goal - and she didn't even have one. Humans tend to set time frames on everything we do. I've been engaged three times in my life. The first - we were in love but too young; the third - we were in love and after a few years and the right timing it just worked out wonderfully. But the second time I, too, was running towards ....??? I don't even know to this day where I was running. But I simply HAD to get there - and I guess I thought marriage was my magic carpet. Needless to say - it wasn't. I thought I had to be married, to have children, to have a home, to have....what? And when all that was finally achieved, that's all we really had - a giant question mark - where do we go from here??
My current (and forever) Husband and I met through work and weren't allowed to date. Which, of course, made us want to date. But we had zero plans for a future with each other. He lived in a different state, but visited Georgia a few times a year (family and business). As I liked to say back then "he was my Boy Toy" - he was going to be someone to go to dinner with - go to Braves games with when he was in town - someone to boost my ego and that was it. I didn't look to the future or wonder if he was going to be there tomorrow, because I simply didn't expect him to be. And I truly believe that since we weren't running to whatever we thought we should be looking for, we found exactly what we needed.
I tried, and hopefully succeeded, to convince Madame X that she simply did not need to do ANYTHING. Since she wasn't sexually active with either man she didn't have a moral obligation to tell each of them about the other. No one was expressing love yet, so she didn't have the guilt of leading anyone on. She could simply sit back and enjoy the fun and excitement and companionship and leave the future to the future!
Yes, I have dealt mainly with the love-relationship angle of this "hurry, hurry, hurry life" topic, but you can apply it to every aspect of your life. Just graduated from college and expect to get your perfect job making 6 digits already? Think again. Got yourself in debt and want to take out more loans to 'hurry up' and get back on your feet? Not smart and it's not going to happen quickly. Knocking on 30's door and think you absolutely have to have a baby now? 40 is the new 30 and adoption is always a fantastic alternative as well. Don't rush your life along just because you think you will be happier or more satisfied if you do. Take a look at how satisfied you are RIGHT NOW....sometimes you really don't want or need to change a thing!!
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